Username: Doctor Gabriel
Character name: His Majesty Lord
[REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] Gabriel, The Vagrant King No Matching Royal Bloodline; Appears To Be A Self Given Title In An Inane Bid To Fein Importance
Age: [REDACTED] Appears Mid To Late Twenties
Height: [REDACTED] Estimated Between Five Feet, Ten Inches And Six Feet Tall
Weight: [REDACTED] Estimated Around One Hundred And Fifty Pounds
Appearance: Artist's Rendition From Memory
Noted Inconsistencies:
-Hair Has Grown Significantly In Length (Seems Fond Of Styling It In The Most Nonsensical Manners Possible)
-Facial Hair Has Grown As Well; Appears The Same Golden Yellow As His Hair
-Eyes Are Too Dark; They’re Always Reported To Be An Incandescent Gold (Some Witnesses Report Seeing Them Shine Like Stars In The Dark of Night)
Profession: [REDACTED] Seems To Live By Conning, Stealing, And Smooth Talking Anyone and Everyone Who Has Something He Wants
Skills: Deadliest Weapon Is His Tongue; Yet To Receive A Report In Which He Hadn’t Been Able To Talk His Way Out Of Trouble With All But Our Agents. Agile And Adept At Moving Through Urban Environments. Has Been Able To Dispatch ALmost All Agents Sent In Pursuit That He Couldn’t Convince To Leave Him Alone With A Pair of Distinct Blades He Carries (Though Strangely, Some Accounts Report A Pair of Pistols In Their Place), One Made Of What Is Believed To Be Talc Due To Its Ivory Coloration and The Other Most Likely Onyx. Smarter And Far More Cunning Than He Lets On. Appears To Have An Unnaturally High Tolerance For Pain. And The Ability To Survive Falls That Would Cripple Most Men
Flaws: Easily Distracted By Women And Drink. In The Few Instances Where Agents Were Able To Disarm Him Of One Of His Weapons, He Has Was Reported To Become So Unbalanced He Could Be Mistaken For Drunk, Becomes Violently Enraged When His Hair Is Mocked, Sullied, Or Otherwise Forcibly Disheveled, Arrogant And Vain, Especially In The Presence Of Men He Perceives As More Attractive Than Himself, Has Just About The Most Ridiculous Hero Complex Ever Documented. Repeatedly Risked Harm And Capture When His Escape Put Innocents In Danger, Especially Women And Children. And, While More Of An Oddity Than A Flaw, He Has Been Sighted On Multiple Occasions Talking To His Swords/Pistols.
Bio: INCOMPLETE
Lord Gabriel, as he insists upon being called, appears to talk to just about anyone and everyone who will listen about who he is and where here’s from. Unfortunately, each recounting is inconsistent and utterly nonsensical.
His favorites appear to be:
-That he is the disgraced son of a tortoise and a rattlesnake that was disowned and banished from his homeland when he fell in love with a Jackalope.
-That he was born in bathtub from unholy union of three men he only ever identifies as “The Butcher,” “The Baker,” and “The Candlestick Maker.”
-That he is an ancient warrior, risen from the dead to finally exact his vengeance upon his neighbor for always stealing his mail.
And, by far the most common: that he is the Messiah, sent from the heavens to save the downtrodden and destitute from their vile, arrogant lords.
While most of these seem to be ploys on his part to convince others he is a harmless lunatic, the last may actually be a truthful account of how he views himself.
As it stands, what follows are the only completely accurate facts we have been able to confirm:
-The first recorded sighting of The Vagrant King was a year ago as he headed North from the Burning Wastes.
-Each settlement, village, town, or city he has passed through has had it’s reigning Lords all brutally murdered within a week of his arrival.
-He constantly seems to vanish or completely outfox pursuers each time any begin closing in on him.
-His last known sighting was in Atticus.