[Alistair Fawkes]

Sometimes I resent the world for making me feel like I need to mask who I really am to get anything I want. I don't need your "Acceptance," or your "tolerance." The words are condescending and patronizing. I just need you to not be an asshole and stopping seeing me with a big flashing neon label over my head; as if anything I do affects your own life somehow.

[Kaderin Triste]

I feel like I keep pushing people away. And it's not consciously intentional. My brain just kind of vomits emotions that I can't properly verbalize without having them come out the wrong way, so I get unintentionally passive aggressive and/or I pull away. And then people kind of give up on me because I'm "too moody" or some other reason. I hate my brain.

[Den]

I wish you could understand just how difficult making phone calls is for me, and just how badly anxiety affects me. I know you get how depression can affect someone, from your own experiences, but you really don't get just how integrated into everything I do each day anxiety has become. It's gotten to the point where I'd rather walk into places to make appointments, and that's even a bit triggering for me at times. I don't like being this way, and I wish to high heaven that I wasn't this way.

[Isis]

I wish I wasn't so scared of social interaction. I don't want to fail my classes again, but I get so scared before each class I feel like I'm gonna puke. I'm already not doing well, but I can turn it around...

[Poggio]

Please for the love of god stop being an asshole. I can hear you. This is not your house, it doesn't mean you can do what ever. It doesn't make sense that you have a child, with a woman and already after months have discarded your family in exchange for a night with what sounds like a porn star, who mewls like a damn cat. It's disrespectful. It's gross. I want to beat the living shit out of you with my machete.

[Den]

I still can't believe that you had the gall to not only put some of my belongings in a hot attic, knowing full well that that could damage some of them, you also had the gall to blame me for one of the items getting damaged beyond my ability to repair it, and that you not only did not apologize, you didn't seem to think you'd done anything wrong, and thus did not need to help me replace what your actions damaged. Nijika was bought with money I earned, that I saved up. I can't fix her, and you've basically ruined a $180 belonging of mine because I didn't get something cleaned up in your timeframe.

This, plus the stunt you and he pulled last year with the federal check that was NOT issued to you... Swear to all things holy that if I ever get the chance, and won't be at risk of you tossing me out on to the street, I am going to get every cent you've stolen from me back, and I will drag your "good" name through the mud. I will make it known what a manipulative, thieving, lying sociopath you are.

IDGAFF if this causes me to be disowned. I already know most of the family doesn't want anything to do with me.

[Potironette]

"You don't care about adults." Ha. Could you not say that to my sister, please? Who's an adult huh? You only care about yourself. They say that people see in others what they see in themselves.

"I hate you." As a mother, could you not say that to your kid please? It's OK for me by now, because I'd be happy if you died in a fire, but my sister actually cares about you? Could you not be so destructive? Please and thank-you?

Opening up all the windows in winter just because YOU were annoyed by a smell? Saying my sister doesn't care about you because she cooked and so there's the smell? What did YOU did when my eyes hurt when you sprayed peppermint oil all over the place? Yell at me, that's what. What do you think condones you to be selfish then? What right do you have to tell another person what you think they are? Okay, I don't believe in rights. But could you not go around abusing your family please? Especially when that family DOES care about you? I don't, but at least my sister, whom you yelled at does. It'd be terrible if she turned out anything like me.

---------------

How can you tell a kid they're "bothersome" and that the next time they "do this thing" you'll "kick them out of the house"? Especially when you say it that way, in that tone of voice--how dare you attack someone personally that way? Not just someone, this is your daughter. How dare, you even attempt to put such thoughts into someone's head. Just because she cooked at night, and forgot to turn off the oven, does not warrant that reaction. AT ALL. Sure, tell her she did something wrong--and she'll be happy to apologize. But you shut off the modem as punishment AND you tell her she's bothersome to the family? Really? Is this a conscious or unconscious attempt at emotional manipulation? And to what end? I can't even say a thing because it'll just exacerbate things, and I don't think my sister would like that. Crazy woman. How dare you call someone else crazy when it's clearly you? How dare you try to call someone bothersome when it's really you? Can't you just point out a fault and let someone learn from it? Can you NOT try to make someone feel like making even one mistake is punishable by kicking someone out? We all learn from our mistakes. Heck, striving to make mistakes is a GOOD thing (well, no. But being unafraid to make mistakes is). There's no such thing as a perfect human being Mom, and you're the least perfect person I know anyway. My sister made a mistake. Don't try to make her feel like it's unforgivable.

[Den]

It's pretty clear that I'm not the favorite child. I've known that since high school. That doesn't give you the right to cause my property to be damaged without offering to replace it, and then blame me for it becoming damaged because I didn't get something cleaned up fast enough for your liking. It also doesn't give you the right to extort money from me, or to hold my property illegally. If I were in a safe place, your ass would be in court, and you'd very likely lose, because I have proof of your actions.

[NCS3RR4N]

In the end, I'm just a honeymoon child. I can tell that much by how much verbal abuse I had to endure for the past few days.

[SparX]

I have spent the past 3 weeks being forced into social interactions I don't want. I was so mentally drained I could barely message people i generally talk to everyday, such was the reason I was not around for a bit.
I was in literal tears last weekend. Why can't people stop and leave me alone? Why am I forced constantly to be other peoples rocks and therapists and goddamn taxis? Why do I have to bend over backwards and cost myself HUNDREDS of dollars when the same people I help won't even be around after I help them, or will only be around when they need something again.
So Fed up, about to change my number and move.
I should not be constantly allowing myself to get walked on hurt like I always do......

[Kaderin Triste]

I am not okay. And no one even knows.

[Awen Moonshine]

Yesterday I had an almost day long anxiety attack after reading an article during lunch... It felt like I was drowning even though I could breathe just fine... I couldn't tell anyone as they just don't understand and I was home alone for once... I don't know what to do, my partner keeps telling me I should start the new meds I was prescribed but I'm too fearful of the side effects to really want to take them. I want to have a clear head while I still have so much work to do rather than risk the meds giving me a foggy head/headaches...

[McSwiggins]

I wish I could pull the trigger...

Edit: also, my 4 year old daughter is going to the child pyschologist to get tested for schizophrenia and I already know he's gonna say she does. What other 4 year old gets caught holding a knife staring off into space and when you ask her whats she's doing and why she has a knife she says "I dont know." In a very vague voice and gives it to em and walk off, or strangle her brother, or smash things in her siblings faces, or have to be restrained because she bangs her head until she bleeds, among other things. Something is seriously psychologically wrong with her and I know already its schizophrenia. I have it to and I feel guilty, like I did this to her somehow because I have it...I'm such a failure as a father. I cant do a single thing right, not even make kids.

[Kaderin Triste]

Not really a secret...but I just needed a place to rant for a sec.

AAAAAAAAAA!!!! Yes, my dragon plushies don't have long spiky tails. YOU STILL CAN FUCKING TELL IT'S A DRAGON THOUGH! So why the hell does EVERYONE ask where it's tail is. For fuck's sake! Not all dragons are the same! It's supposed to be cutsey! A little plush baby dragon! I will not be modifying ANYTHING just to conform to what people seem to expect! My dragons are unique, so fuck off!
D8

Rant done. Thanks, I feel better now.

[Awen Moonshine]

What the fuck is wrong with people on ebay?! How dare you accuse me of lying and being rude when I was polite and tried to explain the situation?! How dare you accuse me of overcharging when you agreed to the price and I even sent a partial refund for overpaid postage!

I'm sick of it all and I am now flat broke because sales for my business have dried up too... I just want to curl up in a ball in bed and never come out again... T_T

[SparX]

Driving alone has been really hard lately.
My head just keeps telling me "Just drive faster, just don't turn the wheel, just go over the edge so you wont endanger anyone else. . . ." It is filled with images of me laying there crumpled, yet feeling fulfilled as I am broken and fading. If I did it at night, no one would find me until it was to late, and I could make sure there would be no saving of me. . . .
but why do I feel like this?
I know I don't have as many reasons to be depressed as others who deserve to, and I thought I had been doing good the past few months. . . . I find no logical reason for me to feel this way, and usually knowing that is enough to shake my own feelings but lately some things are just getting harder then they should be. .. .